Monday, October 5, 2009

Potatoes & Faces


how many of the worlds population actually eat potatoes? (That's what market research companies are for) but innumerable people have eaten fries, chips and baked potatoes (with and without sour cream) So who's to say where they came from. AND WHY IS THERE A TOY AFTER IT?!?! Potatoes are in many different continents (5 or 6 of them), but more specifically the biggest supplier in the United States is Maine (and China) Woooohooooo?

But Potatoes are somethings that should be cherished, though not revered, yet there's Mr. Potato Head. Because who doesn't like eating mashed up body parts? Things like the toy story movies don't help with humanizing the fellow potato -Even though the guy and his wife are plastic. That may be one of the only vegetables, or even fruits for that matter that once were children's toys that are still used today. Yes there is that strawberry shortcake girl but they don't count, as they never were once edible, or at least supposed to be.

But corn doesn't have a toy, the banana has the logo thing for the peanut butter jelly time song, again doesn'tcount. So the next time you sink you teeth into a raw potato (i have no clue who would do that) or have fries from a restaurant (which are probably 20% actual potato) or mashed potatoes, remember that some where, there is a face attached to one. So add a lot of butter to make it taste not like face.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Viruses, Bacteria, or Parasites, which is worse?

H1N1 (excuse me)

As if a pre-Apocalyptic warning the Swine Flu stories have been circulating like wildfire, possibly half of the entire American population will catch. Many times before, like Bird Flu, does something interrupt the normal ways of the everyday-ness of every person,
but exactly why?

People are (pun not intended) Deathly afraid of dying, which creates a scare sending the CDC to investigate, and a pharmaceutical company to arrive with a cure (making millions in cash). But enough about "Current Events" which of the little problems, Viruses, Bacteria, Parasites, is worse?

Parasites aren't intentionally deadly, yes, like the Tapeworms can grow to be 75 feet long, lay eggs and you will die. But leeches, mosquitoes, fleas, ticks, lice, and mites don't intend to kill you, just eat a part that is vital to you but keep you intact. Some anomalies, like West Nile VIRUS or Lyme DISEASE can follow but those are carried and are the result from Viruses.

Bacteria doesn't move, doesn't transfer through the air, water or touch. But in nearly every dark unkempt uncleaned an untouchable space there is a hint of it. The worst is black mold, which can cause respiratory problems, sinus infections, and not to mention it's toxic. Some bacteria are good, like the ones in Everyone's stomach that break down vital nutrients, Woohoo for them. The others can harbor diseases or eat away at most dead substances after a while.

Viruses are massive trauma for Doctors, Physicians, Pediatricians, and the general public. The Cold, the Flu, Ebola, AIDS, Chickenpox, Measles, Rabies, West Nile, and Yellow Fever are all virus. There is nothing positive that a virus does, it attempts to live inside until the subject, or the viruses are killed. Even though they refrain from actually eating the host's body (with no mouth) they absorb multiple nutrients that are key for basic survival. As with Ebola, death is immanent but takes only a few days, and AIDS takes forever, but eventually death happens.

Anyone can read this and know the answer is Viruses, Hooray?!?!? But truth is, the world is a messed up, filthy, disorganized full of Bacteria, Parasites and Viruses, to fear only The Swine Flu be it just as deadly as the common cold or deadly as the bird flu it might have been. Mass panic never solved anything, it in fact has lead to some specific parts of the world whose motif is death. Bird Flu, Hurricanes, 9/11, War in General, Assassinations, Apparently Swine Flu, have only served as examples that the entire world is hellbent on avoiding death, or exposing it through media panic with an effort to stop it from happening else where.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Babies R Cute

So when a man loves a woman, and they conceive, and then birth out a beautiful baby, why is it cute? Could it be that it's a little human? Is it that the eyes are the same size as a baby as an adult? Or is it that they are the physical mixture of two people, then miniature?
Look at any baby, of any species of mammal and compare them to their adults. With their innocent, need of help and obvious cuteness that most people look to their faces and go "Awe, so cute" then make an outrageous face. Them being little humans with their chubby cheeks, big eyes and contagious sweet smiles is more of a genetic defence system that just the supposed fact of them being like that for no reason at all.
There is no possible way that anyone could hurt them. When babies start to cry from being hurt as if they bumped their head, it's nearly unbearable. The natural reaction is to help the balling like bumpkin, comforting them until they no longer feel any more pain. Hunting in the older terms would be all out war on any and all animals, be it sick and old, even the very young were sustenance for any that caught them. But poachers of today still hunt down all the small and innocent exotic babies, and who can hurt such cute defenceless animals? For poachers by the previous statement have no heart as they carelessly slaughter the babies who never hurt anyone.
But this defence system keeps what ever means to hurt the child somehow emotionally attached, which makes them refrain from any form of hurt. A pocket of brilliance from the evolutionary platter of genes, but no matter the effect, babies will always be cute.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Green People

So what are we? A bunch of animals who struggle to keep society? A collective group of cells that are in every organism, giving and keeping them alive? An evolutionary species that was once single celled? Any of those may be true but what if we weren't so much animal as plant.
If we, in cell terms, were made of chloroplasts and cell walls? Would there be a use for stomachs besides water? Would skin be replaced by bark or multiple leathery green layers? There is no telling what manifestations would appear if something as massive as the replacement of natural animal cells with plant cells was to happen but the food service would come crashing down.
Even when taste buds still exist, most of what would be eaten would be for flavor instead of sustenance. Being that most people would have a small stomach, as they would rarely eat, only a few edibles could be eaten. Tasteless things, like grains, poultry, meats, vegetables and (most) fruits would be rare to find. Because sweets like cake, ice cream and anything made with a massive amount of sugar would be bought because they taste good. Even at that, how could a business stay a float, there are places like Walmart that sell a little bit of everything. So say goodbye to convenience stores, because they mostly have food and gas, and 90% of the food wouldn't sell.
Instead of the every day craving of three or more meals a day, sun bathing, tanning and any outdoor activity would increase in popularity. Tanning salons, as infrequently used, would soon take over the fast food business and replace the freezers and refrigerators with tanning beds and sun lamps. The being of summer would make everyone more able too move, if not make them fat. But winter, during a power outage (storm included) would be catastrophic and kill many.
Bugs would be as frequent as the rhino virus, feeding off the innocuous people as they lay in the sun. Like termites they might burrow into the skin and feast, until plump with human-plant blood (what would the color be?). The Humans, or whatever they would be called, would not be the omnivore, more so and reside at the bottom of the food chain. Animals that would hunt humans in ancient years, before technology would adapt and feed upon the unsuspecting people, creating fear, chaos, and many problems throughout the globe.
When the world realizes that it needs the earth and the sun, backing of recycling, non-nuclear weapons, and anti-pollution would increase. Things like the dumping of trash, and fuel emissions would be more carefully weighed. As it seems to be a priority for the UN, but not really, Nuclear weapons and war seem to be their specialty. I highly doubt that in the world of green people, the sun and the environment would not be the number 1 cause for fixing.
How would the body change? Would the hair turn from a long brown to a seaweed style hair or looks like a green afro? Would the ears turn to leaves, as the feet and hands might? The bones would harden to a blend of wood and bone, making teeth look comparatively strange. Mucus would become sludge, and waste products would be reduced to liquid, if not used. Though I highly doubt that there will be a little boy whose wooden nose grows as he tells a lie, then he wants to become a real boy. But take it or leave it, for being turned into a genetic marvel, being part human and part plant would be awesome, give or take the complications. But the decision hasn't even come close to being acknowledged, let alone more than theorized.

Monday, June 1, 2009

0gs of Fun

The fact of Gravity is evidenced all around us, by our falling hair, the rain and standing on a floor. Gravity is the basis of nearly every thing that we as humans do. For instance basketball, with a manipulation of gravity it would become something much more entertaining. Though dribbling would be a bad idea, dunking would be the greatest and liberating thing to do. Now if the gravity was to be increased, the workout would have the same effect. It would be like practicing with a parachute, the muscles would have more of a stress so when the gravity was returned to normal those that practiced under the pressure would have a obvious advantage.
But what would the problems be? Cleaning for zero gravity areas would be horrendous, or a giant vacuum would suck up all the problems. If things like gravity were regulated in compartments, like planetarium-like buildings, the maintenance and cost to use such machines would be so massive only the intensely rich would be able to afford the "adventure." If no one was to regulate the air going in, or if the gravity was unequal some one could suffocate, or even be crushed by the force of gravity.
But how would the machines be powered? Would it be like a massive gasoline generator, a large amount of electricity from telephone wires, power from wind turbines, solar panels covering the entire building. But how they are going to make it create zero gravity is the bigger mystery. There are magnets, but those would create a pull from both sides, creating a look of zero gravity, but the feeling would be non-free-willish, much like the force of the pull forces things into it's pull. There is a plane which simulates the feeling of zero gravity, going high up into the atmosphere then dropping at the exact speed to counter act earth's gravity. This however cannot be performed in a land locked building. Something like a fan would create the same effect as the magnets, so there isn't a way to make it a reality as of the moments right now. The only place that gravity exists without any force that requires unneeded energy, which is space.
So to be completely truthful gravity is the only force that keeps us on earth and without it everyone would float away. If we were to manipulate it correctly, the feeling would be liberating. And even though things in space are unaffected only the future will tell when everyone will get the chance to feel weightless.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Problems and Their Fixers

Say a man, or a woman, or a child ruled the country, what would the problems be then? We already have problems from the previous presidents, so what would set them apart? Is it there charismatic nature? Their message to fix the problems at hand? Could it be the way they wear their suit or put their hair?
The answer to all of those questions is simple, there will always be problems, no matter what, even if global warming was solved we would have problems. But with all of these difficult times comes one person who swears as they become president they will solve it. Many of these times they do their job, but something else will happen.
The idea of a Utopia is a foolish one in any aspect, sure the bright and shining self sufficient megaplex would have to have problems. Of course there would be the ozone, solar flares, possibly fuels if that problem isn't solved, population, and various others that can't be named since we, as a species, are not as advanced to have named them yet.
But look at every single leader, there has always been a major issue they attempted to address, most of the time succeeding. Nelson Mandela, slavery in South Africa. Abraham Lincoln, Slavery in the US and the civil war. Al Gore, Global Warming. Barack Obama, fixing the economy. Even the "villains" of some organizations had an issue they promised to solve. Like Napoleon Bonaparte, Conquest of the World. Even Hitler, who promised eradication of the Jewish people and Conquest of the World.
The only people who this does not apply to are the people with inherited power, like kings and queens. Now not all of the royalty of the world is entirely aimless, Princess Diana was completely into helping the world and she had inherited power. But many of the forgettable royalty did barely anything, which is why it's difficult to name them.
But no matter what, there will always be problems, and with those problems come a person attempting to succeed in the fixing of the said problem. Amazingly enough
sometimes a Leader can come onto the job to fix a problem and inspire another, which again has been many people. The most famous of all was the previous president, who came on to fix the war on terror, and came out with the financial problems. The biggest drag, there is no way to predict the upcoming problems, but there always is and always will be something that needs fixing or improvement.

Monday, May 18, 2009

The Dangers of the Paper Clip

Andrea Brown, age 27 at the time, was a victim of The Clip. She described to the police interviewing her that she walked through the hallways, and suddenly she tripped over something. She attempted to get up and realized the papers that she was holding had dots of blood throughout. She looked down and saw an old unfolded paperclip lodged into her torso. If that paperclip had hit just a few inches to the right it would have punctured her heart causing internal bleeding and death.
Klaus Svitzen of Sweden was not so lucky, as he slipped on the unstable streets on his way home. But as he slipped and hit his head with a far from fatal blow to the back of the head. But a paper clip was ready to attack, It punctured the back of his neck hitting his spine enough to make him a paraplegic for the rest of his life. This major injustice cannot go without warning, so how many different ways can paperclips hurt people if not kill them.
  • Lodged into the eye, causing blindness and possibly brain damage and internal as well as eternal bleeding.
  • Shoved up the nose or in the ears, causing possibly brain damage and internal as well as external bleeding.
  • By causing an infection from being rusty
  • By swallowing it and having it puncture the stomach wall, internal bleeding
  • After stomach wall it would go to the intestines causing the same problem
  • Multiple Stabbings, (murder)
  • A stabbing through the neck, nerves, blood or air tubes could cause death
  • At virtually any vein, or nerve, or bone, or muscle

As you can see, the dangers of the paperclip are massive, so are they worth having in everyday society?